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April 15, 2007

Racing the Bachelor

I’ve been promising a bike photo essay for a few days now, but I’m still a couple of days away from posting it. I took more pictures and had more anecdotes than I anticipated, so I need a bit more time to put finishing touches on it. (I know, I know … another post of mine that turns out longer than expected. Try to contain your shock.)

In the meantime, I have a few random observations from the past few days to keep you occupied:

* First, I loved the response to my previous post about temperature extremes. I heard from people in the Midwest, Rocky Mountains, and Pacific Northwest, former Alaskans and current desert-dwellers, and even someone in the Southern Hemisphere. Really, now – where else but the Internet is that kind of survey possible? And although nobody disputed the notion that I’m really a wimp at heart, the answers were very enlightening – aside from the junk marketing ad that somebody tagged on at the end. So to everybody – except that last guy – who responded, thanks a lot.

* Imagine my surprise as I was catching up on TV shows last week, and discovered that I’m going to be racing against The Bachelor next month. When he was chatting up one of the girls (Tessa) last week, she tried to impress him by saying she was training for the Wildflower triathlon – she didn’t specify which race - to which Andy replied that he would be racing the long course there. As you might have guessed, I have a couple of thoughts on this one …

1) After hearing such news, a competitive person would have gone straight to the computer to Google Andy’s race results, check The Bachelor’s split times against his own, then calculate how far behind Andy he could be after the swim and bike segments to still have a chance of reeling him in during the half-marathon. I’m not saying I did that – it just occurred to me that that’s what a competitive person would do. And you can’t prove otherwise.

2) I rather liked Tessa’s response to Andy: “Well, if it doesn’t work out here (on the show), I’ll see you down there (at the triathlon).” But it’s unclear whether she understands that upwards of 10,000 people will be at Wildflower – so the chances of her just bumping into him down there are about as remote as finding true love on a reality TV show.

But think about this for a second: what if it DID happen? What if she was somehow able to corner Andy while he's standing in line for a porta-potty or waiting to get his body marked, and starts tearing into him about how he never really got to know her, how he had the perfect girl right in front of him and never knew it, or how he was too immature to truly commit himself to a relationship? I mean … wouldn’t you just LOVE to be waiting in that same line?

In fact, it’s not too late for ABC to make this happen, is it? They can take their camera crews down to Lake San Antonio, alert Tessa as to Andy’s whereabouts, then sit back and let the sparks fly. If nothing else, it’s another opportunity to show Andy in his Speedo, and to record a situation - bumping into the Bachelor in real life, after the show has taped - that none of the rejected gals have ever been afforded. As Chris Harrison would say, it would be the most dramatic body-marking line ever.

* And finally, one more story about Wildflower, to illustrate how much the race has been on my brain lately ...

Last week we took a family trip to the Bay Area, and one of our stops was at a place called Mrs Grossman’s sticker factory. It’s apparently one of the largest sticker manufacturers and/or distributors in the world, or something like that – I’m not really sure, since I fell asleep during the introductory 20-minute video.

But after the tour, everyone sits down at craft tables, and they pass out bags of stickers to create your own sticker art. And these are the stickers that were in my bag: swimmers and wildflowers. Um … are you kidding? I quickly rifled through my daughters’ stacks on either side of me looking for cyclists and runners, but I couldn’t find any. It almost felt like Mrs Grossman was deliberately teasing me.

But I'm not easily deterred. With those limited resources, here is the front of the postcard I made:


And here’s the back:


I know, it’s still almost three weeks until Wildflower – but to say I’ve been thinking about this race a lot would be a huge understatement.

It’s almost time to put all the training of the past several months to the test. Time to dive in the warm water, break in my new bike, and run wild at one of the most difficult triathlons in America. And - as if I needed any extra pressure - it's time to see if I can keep up with The Bachelor.

In other words, it’s almost go time. I can hardly wait.

10 comments:

Matt 4/15/07, 1:06 PM  

You watch the Bachelor? Man, I thought I knew you so well.
Good luck with the training. I'm so glad race season is here. Enjoy!

SkiRough 4/15/07, 5:31 PM  

Ha! He is really hot though! :) Sounds like your typical type-a, uber accomplished triathlete. So did you determine if you'll be able to real him in on the run?

I know that "Ryan" from the Bachelorette did Kona Ironman a few years ago, it is on one of my Ironman DVDs, he is a featured athlete. I think 2004?

Annette 4/15/07, 9:43 PM  

I'm wondering if the Wildflower suddenly got a bunch of women signed up after watching that episode. :) So, do you think you can beat him? I mean, c'mon, we know you've got his pace all figured out.

Nice sticker art! I think someone's excited about this race. :)

stronger 4/16/07, 7:50 AM  

She's not doing Wildflower. Go back and listend again..."um, the Wildflower one." She Internet stalked him and saw Wildflower on his schedule. A triathlete would not say, "um, the Wildflower one." She would have been proud and said, "I doing Wildflower". Or I could be wrong and she'll pass me on the course trying to make her way to Andy. I think the guy got a bunch of duds in that mix.

Deene 4/16/07, 8:10 AM  

cool post card!

momo 4/16/07, 10:42 AM  

i agree with carrie, that guy got a bunch of duds in that group. especially the doublemint twins. next time i'm doing laps, i think i'll hold hands with the girl next to me, too. ;-)

rick 4/16/07, 3:15 PM  

If I wasn't already in the event itself I'd volunteer for the body marking job. I was a body marker for the whole weekend at Treasure Island Triathlon last November...got compliments on the legibility of my numbers too and no mistakes....err so far anyway...can you imagine? A friend working next to me had to x out a bunch of numbers and start over. It didn't look good. The marker fumes are the worst though, makes you dizzy.

Dori 4/17/07, 7:03 PM  

Fabulous post card. Is that Andy on the front of the card? I think maybe you watch too much TV. :-)

Tiffany 4/17/07, 8:21 PM  

Finally! A man that admits watching The Bachelor! I recently came out and admitted my addiction. It felt good to get it out in the open.

Coach Tammy 4/17/07, 11:13 PM  

You say "three weeks" like that's a long time out. It's almost taper time, Baby!!

I watched the Bachelor for the first time last night (or was it the night before? whatever)... and it's all Jessi's fault! I refuse to watch one more episode. REFUSE!!!

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