The Final Rose
Before we get to today’s post, a couple of people have asked for my take on the whole Britney Spears-Paris Hilton pairing. You know, the two straight weeks of partying and club hopping and generally making fools of themselves - occasionally without pants.
I have to say I was a bit surprised. I guess I figured that after her divorce, Britney would follow the lead of Jessica Simpson by making herself super-hot, then dating an NFL quarterback or some other alpha male. But apparently she has a different strategy in mind.
Now I’m thinking of it this way: Have you ever trained really hard for several months in anticipation of a race? And when the race was over, did you have a period of a few weeks where you blew off training, stayed up late every night, and ate as many dessert items as you could find? It’s almost like you say to yourself, “Screw it - I know all of this is self destructive, but I don’t care right now. I just want to enjoy myself.”
So maybe that’s what Britney’s doing with Paris – enjoying a brief self-destructive phase just to blow off some steam and enjoy herself for a while. Then hopefully after a couple more weeks, she’ll decide to get her act together and shift into training mode again. Hopefully.
Of course, the other (more likely) explanation is that I didn’t know what the hell I was talking about in that previous post. But I hope that’s not it.
OK, on with today’s post…
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I’ve never really been one to believe in soulmates.
You know what I mean – the romantic notion that there is only one person in the great big world who is the ideal match to your personality. That your perfect companion is wandering somewhere around the great big world, and once you find that person, you’ll realize true happiness and enjoy a passionately rewarding relationship.
Honestly, I think that’s all a bunch of hooey.
When it comes to finding happiness, I tend to think in a more practical manner. It seems like successful relationships rely on fundamentals like maturity, humility, and a commitment to working through difficulties together. Yes, there are some personality types that naturally mesh well with others, but if the core values are too dissimilar, even those “ideal matches” will eventually become strained.
On the other hand, people with similar fundamentals can overcome a lot of obstacles. And if two such people dedicate themselves to each other, their relationship will most likely be a success.
This theory inherently contradicts the notion of soulmates, in that somebody could potentially create a happy, fulfilling relationship with any number of people (although not all at once. Unless you live in Utah.). For example, if I hadn’t happened to meet my future wife in college, there’s a pretty decent chance that I might have found somebody in grad school or later in my career who could have made me just as happy.
As you can imagine, this line of thinking could potentially get me into big trouble with my current wife. Except for one thing: she happens to agree with me.
Each of us often says that the other person would have no problem finding a new mate should something tragic ever happen. Then the other one of us denies that he/she could ever find a relationship as great as what we have now. We both know the response is basically a lie, but it’s always the right thing to say. (Aren’t we sweet that way?)
The reason I bring all this up is that this Saturday is the lottery drawing for the Western States 100-mile Endurance Run. Yes, it makes sense. Just hear me out.
I’ve wanted to run Western States for several years now. It’s at the top of my list of races that I haven’t yet done but dearly want to. So to say I’ve been looking forward to this lottery day for the past few months would be putting things very mildly.
If I get in (about a 50/50 chance), that race will be the primary focus of next year’s race calendar, and of my immediate training plans. Between now and next June, I’ll run countless miles on the hilly trails of Monterey County. I’ll run in the dark. I’ll run at midnight. Heck, I’ll probably even run hilly trails in the dark at midnight.
In short, I’ll commit myself to doing all of the necessary training that will maximize my chances of finishing the race. And I’m very confident that I’ll succeed.
Considering all of that, I’ll be somewhat disappointed if I don’t get in. But I certainly won’t be crushed by the rejection. That’s because I don’t believe in soulmates - in relationships or with races.
As much as I’m dying to do it, Western States isn’t my soulmate race. If I’m left out of the lottery this time around, I have a backup plan in place (that many of you have already guessed by now) that I’m equally enthusiastic about. And I would be perfectly happy in that situation as well.
The training would be different. The race schedule would be different. But I’ll still dedicate myself to doing all of the necessary work, and I’m very confident that I can succeed at the other race also.
All I need now is to establish where my loyalties lie. In that regard, this week I’ve felt like The Bachelor before the final rose ceremony: there are two totally hot options in front of me, but I can only keep one of them. They’re each a little crazy in their own quirky ways, but I can truly envision myself being happy with either one. What’s most important is that, in my heart, I know that I’m ready to fall in love.
(Except that, thanks to the lottery system, I don’t actually get to offer the final rose myself – it will be given vicariously by some dude in the Placer High School cafeteria. So the analogy isn’t perfect. But you get the idea.)
Anyway, the drawing takes place on Saturday, and the results will be posted on the Western States website that afternoon. I’ll also place a short post here with the news.
You don’t have to wish me luck. Just wish me love.









